Soccer moms may have lost the political clout they would need to overthrow the next election. Dads are diluting their numbers. Moms are not the only ones on the sidelines at their kid’s soccer games anymore. Dads are finally taking a masculine stand and appeasing their wives wishes.
Dads may be throwing the national electoral out-of-whack because in their manly assertiveness they are actually attending their kids soccer games! Sure, moms still rule the bandage aisle, the school bake sales, and even the world of baby birthing, but not the soccer games.
This is a preview of
Basketball Moms May Throw The Next Election
.
Read the full post (893 words, estimated 3:34 mins reading time)Share This
There’s a lot of language today that confuses me. For example, does anyone know why certain people try to get someone’s attention by shouting out, “Yo!” And if that doesn’t work, they become redundant and shout out “Yo Yo!” That could be very confusing if you work for Duncan Toys or are a classic cellist.
In today’s language, everyone is a brother or, if they need to save their voice, “Bro,” as in, “yo, Bro!” When not being siblings, they’re “Dudes,” as in “Hey, Dude,” not to be confused with “Hey, Jude,” a greeting reserved for circumcised Jews.
Share This
Well ladies and gents, I have once again been humbled. This happened last Saturday. Please don’t try this at home. My Father-in-law called and wanted to take our 5 year old to the carnival. I was going to take him, but my Father-in-law wanted my wife to go as well.
Share This
10. If a Cat comes home at 4am, it slinks in, quietly, and lies down. When your Child comes home, there is a loud crash in the hallway followed by laughing, singing and belching. Afterwards, when it finally gets quiet, the home becomes awash with loud snoring accompanied by the Flapper Butt Band playing “Smell Me Honey All Night Long” and occasionally mixing in with the White Porcelain Buddy Band playing the hit tune “Barf Until You Feel It Down Below.”
This is a preview of
The Top Ten Reasons Why A Cat Is Better Than A Returning Adult Child
.
Read the full post (491 words, estimated 1:58 mins reading time)Share This
“I wish I could, but I don’t have time”. “Sorry, but I have too much to do”. “Maybe I can fit it in next week”. Monday turns into Thursday and Thursday turns into the following month. I feel like a dog chasing its tail. It’s time to stop and smell the beef jerky treat.
It’s time to enjoy the reason we moved to Southern California - the weather. For my husband and me living in the East had become one of those four-letter words - snow. Now I’m addicted to sunshine.
Share This
My watch runs fast. In spite of the jeweler telling me that it runs perfectly, I know that its hands spin around the dial when I’m not looking.
Time seemed to pass very slowly when I was a child. The week before we went to the circus seemed at least a month long.
When my grandmother complained about time going too fast, I thought she was a bit daft. I thought she was the best grandmother in the world, but a bit daft. I don’t anymore.
Share This
“I wish I could, but I don’t have time”. “Sorry, but I have too much to do”. “Maybe I can fit it in next week”. Monday turns into Thursday and Thursday turns into the following month. I feel like a dog chasing its tail. It’s time to stop and smell the beef jerky treat.
It’s time to enjoy the reason we moved to Southern California - the weather. For my husband and me living in the East had become one of those four-letter words - snow. Now I’m addicted to sunshine.
Share This
Once upon a time there was a little girl named Goldilocks. When I was a little girl, this was just a bedtime story. As an adult, I can read the lesson between the lines. Picky people are hard to bear.
When I heard the story of “Cinderella”, I wanted glass slippers. Now I would need the slippers in size eight and a half. If I tried to squeeze my feet into eights, I’d undoubtedly shatter my dreams about Prince Charming. “If the shoe fits, wear it” is “Cinderella’s” lesson.
Share This
Brunch must have been invented by a female. When we lived on the East Coast, brunch was a late, Sunday breakfast at home. It was an edible excuse for me to sleep more and cook less.
On the West Coast brunch is big business. On the West Coast you don’t have bunch, you DO brunch. On the West Coast you do brunch on Saturday or Sunday.
There are two kinds of brunch - menu and buffet. If it’s my choice, it means my birthday is on a weekend.
Share This
My conscience won’t go on vacation. I can slather it with sunscreen and lay it in the sun, I can buy it maps and take it sightseeing, I can dress it up and take it out for a romantic dinner - but it refuses to go on vacation.
While I’m trying to have fun, my conscience continually lectures me. Although I try to explain that a vacation is time to do and eat things you don’t at home, it won’t listen. My conscience nags me most about exercise. It insists I make time to exercise on vacation.
Share This
